Probably the best satire site ever
Missoula, MT- Arnold “Arnie” Wilson, 62 of Missoula Montana has died after eating 73 goldfish from his personal fish tank. The fish were too much for him to digest at once. With all of those fish floating around in his belly their feces began to pile up inside him and within 5 days he was … Read more Montana Man Dies From Eating 73 Of His Pet Goldfish
Houston, TX- 34 year old Spencer Williams had been trafficking drugs in corpses for 2 years before he was caught. During a viewing at his funeral home on March 22nd, one of the grieving family members noticed a little something in the mouth of their dearly departed uncle and asked another family member to verify … Read more Houston Mortician Arrested For Trafficking Drugs In Corpses.
Bakersfield, California- Phil Keller aged 33, is under suspicion of at least 37 acts of necrophilia after his manager caught him having intercourse with a prostitute he should have been pumping full of embalming fluid, not his penis. “I can’t believe the son of a bitch. The shit he was doing is beyond all imagination. … Read more Funeral Home Employee Gets Caught With His Pants Down. Suspected Of 37 Acts Of Necrophilia
Butte, MT – In a strange twist of events Shep Arnold reveals to police how his debauchery began. “Jerky making has been part of my family for generations. My Grandad Earl Arnold was the best I’d ever seen. I always wanted to live up to his standards. Man I tried all kinds of different meats; … Read more Shep Arnold Who Sold Jerky Made Of Human Meat Started Off With His Mother
Midland, TX- Former pipe fitter Richard “Rex” Campbell has been living with the mummified remains of his mother for over 20 years. Before we go any further let us state that there has been no crime committed. Ursula Campbell passed away from natural causes in the late 90’s and it was her final wish to … Read more Texas Man Has Been Living With The Body Of His Mummified Mother For Over 20 Years
Ranchester, Wyoming- Brother and sister, Ted and Amanda Matthews have been arrested on multiple charges of some seriously shocking crimes. The Matthews family has always kept to themselves with only the most dire of emergencies bringing anyone of them into town. So it was no surprise to most that their heinous crimes had gone on … Read more Wyoming Siblings Charged With Incest, Murder And Cannibalism Of Their Entire Family
Trevor Miller thought he was being smart by taking advantage of the recent hoarding of bottled water by selling “Dehydrated Water” to people in need of water. Miller got the idea when he was thinking of quick ways to make a buck and also the fact that he got tricked by the same scheme. Miller … Read more Washington State Man Arrested For Selling Dehydrated Water
