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Month: September 2021

Man Arrested After 21 Sheep Die As A Result Of Having Sex With Him

September 17, 2021 Bonine 0
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Lewistown, MT- Clay Maurrs (29), has been arrested after 21 sheep died as a result of Clay having vigorous intercourse with them. Clay called the vet to come out and check on the sheep. But by the time he got there the sheep had passed away. The vet went to […]

Man Leaving Parking Spot Gets Honked At To Move Faster. He Re-parked His Car And Walked Away. “I took The Bus Instead. Fuck Them”

September 16, 2021 Bonine 0
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Thousand Oaks, CA- Kurt Williams (77), is a patient man. He doesn’t get all bent out of shape over what other people do. He minds his own business, a rare commodity these days. He likes to laugh at people who get upset at grocery checkout lines. “As if complaining helps. […]

Starbucks Barista Loses Her Shit On A Complaining “Karen”, Dumps Frappuccino’s On Her Head

September 15, 2021 Bonine 0
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Ventura, CA- In a world filled with complainers one barista took a stand. Lauren Geno (27) had just started working at Starbucks the week prior to the incident. Within the first few hours of her first shift, the audacious privilege of the generic “Karen” woman was starting to wear thin […]

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Woman Runs Through 147 Red Light Cameras In Boyfriend’s Car After She Catches Him Cheating. He Now Owes Over $180k In Fines.

September 14, 2021 Bonine 0
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Ventura, CA- Kennedy Warren (33), is not your typical vengeful girlfriend. She’s not going to key your car as Frank Bilder found out. Kennedy had just caught her boyfriend cheating the weekend before. She walked in on Frank with 2 prostitutes. After a few days of thinking how to get […]

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Golden Corral Bans Man For Life After Eating Too Much Food.

September 14, 2021 Bonine 0
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Cicero, IL- Glen Furlong (28), has officially been banned by Golden Corral. He is no longer welcome in any of their establishments. You have to be pretty special to get kicked out of a place that offers all you can eat meals. Glen is that guy. To save on money […]

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Tesla To Implement “Safe Sex Mode” In All Its New Vehicles

September 13, 2021 Bonine 0
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Palo Alto, California- Tesla is installing a safe sex mode into all its newly produced vehicles. We all know about “insane” mode, but what the heck is “safe sex” mode? Well it is and isn’t what you think. Let us explain; It is not a contraceptive or way to protect […]

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Band Called The “Rocky Mountain Oyster Boys” Caught Milking Bulls After A Concert In Montana.

September 12, 2021 Bonine 0
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Butte, MT- Mark, Andy, Gary and Adam are all members of the band “Rocky Mountain Oyster Boys”. They started out playing music in high school together. The chose the name Rocky Mountain Oyster Boys in honor of their favorite dish and favorite animal. On Saturday night The Oysters boys played […]

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Yoga Teacher Accidentally Craps Herself During Hot Yoga. Downward Facing Dog Was Never Supposed To Be Like This!

September 10, 2021 Bonine 0
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Santa Barbara, CA- Kelly Arnold (32) has been a Yoga instructor for 8 years. There’s not a whole lot she doesn’t like about bending, twisting and holding. She recently started teaching a hot yoga class. Her hot yoga class reaches temperatures of 100F and above. The class was going real […]

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Paula Abdul Will Blow You For $10k At Her New Las Vegas Residency! Everybody Is Coming!

September 7, 2021 Bonine 0
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Las Vegas- Paula Abdul received a call about doing a residency in Vegas. Her phone hadn’t rang in a long time so the chance to impress for a residency in Vegas seemed amazing! She flew out to the desert that night. The next morning she went to the MGM where […]

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Woman Finds Used Condom From 1994 Under Her Right Boob

September 6, 2021 Bonine 0
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Camarillo, CA- Belinda Miles (55), went to get a physical for a new job this past week. While being examined the doctor lifted up her right breast for inspection and out popped a condom. A used condom at that! Embarrassed and stunned, Belinda tried to wrack her brain as to […]

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