Ted Beyers of Phoenix Arizona will be spending the next few weeks recovering from a gruesome wound he suffered as a result of a dare gone wrong. Over the weekend Ted and his buddies gathered to watch NASCAR, drink beers and harass each other as good buddies tend to do. […]
Randy Cahill of Fountain Valley California has been arrested following a seemingly random spree of shitting on people’s private property. Turns out the locations where Cahill made a “deposit” were all prearranged with clients. Randy Cahill is in the revenge business and for $100 he would shit on a location […]
Las Vegas, NV- Orenthal James Simpson (74), commonly referred to as “O.J.” is in hospice at his Las Vegas home. O.J. acquired AIDS from a prostitute in Mexico after being banished from Las Vegas brothels. In the weeks leading up to what is likely the end, O.J. has hinted at […]
Ottowa, Canada- Justin Trudeau has announced that Will Smith may not seek refuge in Canada, “For years our borders have been open to our neighbors from the south, but let me make this clear, we don’t need anymore violent Americans in our country . We are aware of Will Smith’s […]
New York, NY- A popular Domino’s pizza restaurant has been shut down after a surprise inspection by Domino’s Corporate offices. The inspection revealed the restaurant was using various brands of store bought frozen pizza’s to cut costs. It is said that hard times drove store owner, Walter Hughes to take […]
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