Tallahassee, FL – Peter Miller was having a hard time finding employment after being released from prison just months earlier. He couldn’t understand why he would never get past the first interview with potential employers. Miller began to accept the fact that he may have to start with a honest, humble job and work his … Read more Florida man doesn’t understand why he can’t get a job, proceeds to trash the McDonald’s that won’t hire him.
North Pole- Kris Kringle A.K.A. “Santa Claus”, was arrested for running a prostitution ring. Kringle had acquired a methamphetamine to help keep him awake when delivering presents around the globe. According to North Pole police, Kringle needed a way to fund his ever increasing drug habit. He took volunteers to be prostitutes as he is … Read more Christmas is cancelled this year due to Santa’s drug habit that he funded by pimping out his elves.
Houston TX- Charles Ottoblock 19, was arrested leaving a motel know for prostitution. A police spokesman said, “The suspect didn’t try to run or deny his involvement. He was just so happy. Easiest arrest of the year”. When questioned by the media as to why he didn’t seem upset about his arrest Ottoblock explains, “as … Read more Man loses virginity to hooker, gets arrested and couldn’t care less.
Los Angeles, CA- Bride to be had a little more fun than most during her bachelorette party. Her friends surprised her with a midget stripper by the name of “Short Man Long Dong”. Mostly seen as a prank, the bride Florence Monroe, was actually pleasantly surprise by her friends “joke”. She’d always had a “thing” … Read more Bride To Be Gets Pregnant By Midget Stripper!!!
Houston, Texas- Lucy Bentwood, aged 81, has been arrested on 13 charges of first degree murder. The suspect has been linked to at least 5 different retirement homes where suspicious deaths have occurred. Bentwood would befriend men whom had no heirs to leave the money too. She would gain their trust and build relationship with … Read more The Blue Pill Granny has been caught after a series of deaths have been linked to her. They say she would “dose them and ride them”.
Houston, Texas– On September 23 a Jersey Village man was arrested for indecent exposure at Best Buy (location withheld to protect the innocent). The mans name is Heathcliff Von Stuber age 33 . Police were called when Stuber proceeded to fill out his check using a pen gripped by his penis. The cashier claimed the … Read more Man arrested for writing a check with his p*nis at Best Buy