breaking

Atlanta, GA- Dan Cathy 68, is not a household name, but his chicken is. Dan is CEO of Chick-fil-A and after returning from a failed trip to England where the Queen denied his request to meet, stories started surfacing of a hotel party where he was at attendance. Cathy and […]

Butte, MT- Jessica Marshall (28) of Butte Montana has been arrested on 7 counts of cannibalism. Ms. Marshall is not accused of any killings or crimes other than the eating of humans. Ms. Marshall is a well loved local Butte school teacher and a respected member of the community. Having […]

Houston, TX- Elon Musk has launched his sperm into space. Not surprised? Neither are we. The megalomaniac has been using Spacex rockets to scatter these cryotanks all over space and into unknown universes. Apparently Musk has long held to the idea that there is life, intelligent life other than our […]

Hollywood , CA- After many years of speculation Ryan Seacrest comes out of the closet in spectacular fashion by announcing he is in a relationship with Mario Lopez. Wait Mario Lopez?! You heard right! By Seacrest announcing their relationship, Lopez also came out of the closet. Lopez like Seacrest, was […]

Los Angeles, CA- Word has leaked that Gwen Stefani is not the driving force behind all her new plastic surgeries. You would had to have lived under a rock the last 25 plus years not to know who Gwen is or how beautiful of a woman she has always been. […]

North Pole- Kris Kringle A.K.A. “Santa Claus”, was arrested for running a prostitution ring. Kringle had acquired a methamphetamine habit to help keep him awake when delivering presents around the globe. According to North Pole police, Kringle needed a way to fund his ever increasing drug habit. He took volunteers […]

Blue Ridge, GA- Ernest Cornwebby III (59), is just your everyday kind of fellow. Not know for his smarts or being extraordinary in any way. “Ernie” to the people of Blue Ridge, is dependable and honest. Slow, but steady. “A good man with a heart of gold. Just a little […]

Phoenix, AZ- Rebecca Miller (26), is the kind of teacher that goes above and beyond to reach her students and help them to achieve their goals. Miller knew this year would be tough, what with all classes be held on Zoom, she was going to have a hard time keeping […]

Federal Medical Center, Fort Worth TX- Joe Exotic is in the headlines again, this time for a slip up on a phone call with his lawyer, Francis Bailey. Exotic, in a rage filled tirade spoke of the location of Baskin’s missing Ex-Husband Don Lewis. He started to tell his lawyer […]

Fairhope, AL- Jethro Stumpford (61), was enjoying a mid Sunday morning dip in the lake. Jethro has had a passion for the water ever since he found a fondness for catfish. Yes, the fish. According to court records the Stumpford family is “closer” than many others and intelligence is not […]