Miller Lite To Start Selling Cocaine Lite, “A Dry Beverage For Your Nose”.


Chicago, Il. – Miller Lite has announced a new product set for release the fourth quarter of 2022. After Heineken released 0.0 beer, Miller wanted to be on the forefront of the next big thing. The tagline, “A dry beverage for your nose” was coined for their new product Cocaine Lite.

“I love Cocaine Lite so much, that I just bought two kilos”, world renown doctor, Dr. Riverson.

Cocaine Lite looks like, tastes like and most importantly smells like cocaine. Cocaine Lite does not have narcotic effects. It will not keep you up all night. You can pass a drug test because it’s cocaine free cocaine.

The part Miller left true to the original is, that you can never get enough of the stuff.

“I just bought two more kilos”

Cocaine Lite will be sold in grams to continue to help Americans learn the metric system.

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