


Wife Sews Husbands Butthole Shut After He Says, “The meatloaf tastes a little funny. Did you follow the directions?”
Houston, TX- Meghan Miller (41), was arrested after her husband showed up at a local hospital with his butthole sewed shut. Travis Miller (44), wasn’t initially forthcoming when asked how he his butt got sewed up. When Mrs. Miller showed up, it was obvious to hospital staff that something had […]



Woman Gets iPhone 12 Pro Max Stuck In Vagina While Shoplifting At Best Buy
Los Angeles, CA- Shelia Ryans needed money and she needed it fast. iPhone 12’s sell quick on the streets and she knew that. Shelia engaged into conversation with one of the employees, while she constructed a plan to steal the phone. She kept asking the employee to show her different […]

ELDERLY WOMAN BEATS OFF WOULD BE BURGLAR IN THE DARK. “No One Can Beat Off A Man Better Than Me!”
Butte, MT- Linda Meyers (72), woke in the middle of the night to sounds of an intruder. She rolled to the side of her bed and picked up her little league t-ball bat. This isn’t a major league bat, but it will still do a great deal of damage. After […]

Sexy Siamese Twin Porn Actresses, Jackie And Lola Anders Are Pregnant!
Jackie and Lola Anders are back in the spotlight again. This time it’s not their videos or events drawing attention. No, it’s that they are with child! The twins shared the happy news on their personal Instagram account on a post titled, “You, me and baby make three ❤️❤️❤️”. This […]

This Granny’s Dating Profile Will Have You In Tears 😂 😂
Butte, MT – Lyanna Wentmore (78), is hitting the dating scene running after encouragement from her children to “get out there and enjoy yourself”. Lyanna has been single since her husband, Earl Bob passed away over 10 years ago. No one helped her in writing her dating profile. Lyanna said, […]

Local Priest Arrested For Spiking Communion Wafers With Acid.
Father Brad McConnors (48), was arrested this morning leaving the house for his morning jog. McConnor’s is the most popular young priest at St. Peters Catholic Church in Springfield, Il. More people show up to his Masses than any others. One parishioner said, “I can feeeeeeel the Holy Spirit talking […]

The Shocking Perils Of Prison Life. Phil Spector Hanging On At Age 80.
California Health Care Facility, Stockton, CA- Phil Spector is having a hard time adjusting to prison life. Showering with 75 other men twice a day everyday is not how the former record executive thought he would be spending his final years on the planet. Spector is located at CHCF (California […]