October 15, 2021

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Couple Arrested Trying To Sell Their Children For Bitcoin

Sylvia (27) and Ed MacEwan (29) of El Dorado Alabama were looking to cash in and get themselves some Bitcoin during this latest craze of the popular cryptocurrency. Like most of us the MacEwan’s has been having a hard time making ends meet from one stimulus check to the next. On top of that, all of their children are home driving them nuts instead of being “babysat by the school district” as Sylvia likes to call it.

Mrs. MacEwan spends most her days trolling facebook telling people how to live their lives and reporting things that she doesn’t agree with. One day while scrolling she saw an ad for Bitcoin. She was mesmerized. It has doubled so many times over the years that surely now was the time to buy in when prices were at a high. She told Ed all about it and within seconds he was on board. They ran into a couple problems; Sylvia and Ed did not have the slightest idea about how to acquire Bitcoin and they were completely broke.

The Hero of the day Otto Handover taking a selfie.

Sylvia contacted the one guy who knows something about everything, Otto Handover. Otto is a petty criminal and a habitual drunkard. All the cops in town know his name. Sylvia explained to him her need for Bitcoin and the lack of funds to make that happen. Sylvia did have one thing in abundance though… Her children. It was at that moment Sylvia decided to go all in on the Bitcoin craze.

With Ed on board, they got Otto drunk and told him they wanted to trade their kids for Bitcoin. Otto at first declined but the next day he came by with a plan to make the transaction happen. Remember when we said all the cops in town know Otto’s name? Well it just so happens they also give him money for tips and information on crimes. He’s the town informant. The MacEwan’s were going to regret this, they just didn’t know it yet.

Otto setup a meet with a guy he knew could make all this happen, Heathcliff Strassenberger. Strassenberger is actually Detective Strassenberger and this is now an undercover sting. Otto made the introductions and the couple began to talk business with Heath. Let us tell you at this point that the children are okay. As soon as Mr. and Mrs. MacEwan left them they were taken into protective custody until a proper custodian could be found.

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, When asked his thoughts on The MacEwan’s Detective Heathcliff Strassenberger had this to say, “Two of the most vile and selfish people I have ever met in my life”.

Once Detective Strassenberger gets all the information he needs on his hidden recording device, an arrest is made. Sylvia and Ed were in complete shock. They seriously couldn’t believe that this was not real and a setup. The couple messed up big time and the state is looking to set some new precedents when it comes to jail terms for the crimes they are accused of perpetrating. “They will never see the light of day again. Truly despicable people”, says a source inside town hall.

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