January 15, 2022

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New Reports Show Joe Biden’s Maternal Grandparents Were First Cousins

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Scranton, PA- The local Department of Public Records in Scranton Pennsylvania has made an interesting discovery regarding the 46th President of the U.S. Joseph R. Biden Jr.. More specifically information has come out during a recent audit of birth records in Scranton that President Biden’s Maternal Grandparents were first cousins. Meaning that his mother, Catherine Eugenia Finnegan is the product of incest.

The grandparents in question are; Ambrose J. Finnegan and Geraldine C. Blewitt. Both born in a time when Scranton was a small town and not much bigger when they were adults. “Back in those days, with not many people to choose from, marrying one’s own first cousin was not big news. In fact it was not news at all at the time. Today such an arrangement seems ridiculous, but when you needed to produce children to help on the farm no one was sending off blood tests to check compatibility. They needed to breed and doing so with your cousin was the norm back then to produce hearty children capable of handling chores to lighten the parents load”, said anthropologist Ruth Gainsby.

First cousins; Ambrose J. Finnegan and Geraldine C. Blewitt.

We reached out to the White House for comment and were denied the request. There is likely not to be much backlash or even news time spent on this subject. “Everyone has skeletons in their closet. Everyone. And with what the last president has personally done and how so many turned a blind eye, we imagine that no one will care what the current Presidents grandparents from over 100yrs ago did. That is except the, “I know you are but what am I” crowd that will take any opportunity to seem clever.

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