Beaumont, TX – Matthew “Moe” Johnson was arrested Sunday when he was caught having sexual relations with “Emmy”, the family sheep. Moe was caught by his father who left church to pick up his wife’s asthma inhaler with the intentions of returning back to the service.
Moe’s dad, Phil, heard a strange noise coming from the backyard and went to check on it. What he saw would forever change him, “I saw Moe giving it to Emmy doggystyle” said Phil.
Moe didn’t stop because he wasn’t done. Moe went on to explain to his father how he and Emmy had a relationship and this was just an expression of their love, all the while Moe was still thrusting away.
Phil called the cops because he’s no idiot and his son is a sick f*ck. When authorities arrived, they immediatly removed him from the presense of Emmy and into the back of a police cruiser. He is currently on a 72hr hold at a mental hospital.