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America- The KKK have released a statement to the public claiming that their racist ways are now a thing of the past; “For too many years have we hid behind our little white sheets. We’re a mob of middle class white men with fat wives who make us cucks. Too […]

Helena, MT- Helena Regional Airport was the site of some commotion today when a large man was caught trying to smuggle 45 MAGA hats in his anus onto a airplane. Peter Peters was stopped by TSA when the body scanner showed the hats in his ass. TSA agents asked Peter […]

Los Angeles, CA- Prostitute Kylie Porter (25), was sitting in the Los Angeles county jail on solicitation of prostitution charges this past weekend when she reached out to reporters in regards to the President’s son, Hunter Biden. Ms. Porter, who was recently diagnosed with AIDS, had an ongoing affair with […]

Las Vegas, NV- Popular singer Celine Dion has been diagnosed with stage 3 incurable LIGMA (Lymphnoid Intracellular Gastrioplasmasis Melivial Apadatharie). Routine blood tests the singer took last week detected anomalies in her white blood cell count. Additional testing confirmed what doctors had feared, that the singer had contracted LIGMA. Not […]

Ted Beyers of Phoenix Arizona will be spending the next few weeks recovering from a gruesome wound he suffered as a result of a dare gone wrong. Over the weekend Ted and his buddies gathered to watch NASCAR, drink beers and harass each other as good buddies tend to do. […]

Dirk Ribson of Modesto California was pulled over going 150mph in his Honda Civic late Tuesday night. With Speeds like that the officer that pulled him over had no choice but to arrested him and book him in the county jail. During the cavity search, Dirk was hesitant at opening […]

Professional Cyclist Bethany Sanders was practicing for her next race in Italy when the most terrible thing imaginable happened! She wound up on a bumpy road and she must have hit one bump just right because all of the sudden her bike seat slipped right up into her vagina. Immediately […]

Folsom, CA- Throwing bags semen is an act of terrorism when you’re a prisoner in Folsom, so when Kent Green Tossed 5 huge bags at semen on Correction Officers (CO’s), all the other prisoners stood in disbelief for a short time before turning on each other and starting a riot […]

Bakersfield, CA- Melody Andrew (72) was playing a nice game of monopoly with three of her adult grandchildren one night at the trailer park. They play about once a year because it usually ends in the board being thrown into the air and no one actually ever winning. Everything was […]

Camarillo, CA- Belinda Miles (55), went to get a physical for a new job this past week. While being examined the doctor lifted up her right breast for inspection and out popped a condom. A used condom at that! Embarrassed and stunned, Belinda tried to wrack her brain as to […]